An old poem, but one I re-read quite often, as my tendencies tend to
turn this direction more often then is perhaps healthy. I'm sure I'm not
the only one who feels this way, in this grim society of uncertainties
and constant deceptions. Enjoy, and symphatise, if you've the ability,
after so long of heardening.

The Only Thing That Saves Me...
-------------------------------

The only thing that saves me
Is my word
A fickle a thing
A promise easily broken

~*~

You won't haunt me when I'm gone
And you'll never be able to follow me
Through the deepest pits of hell,
And beyond

~*~

I sometimes stay in a corner
I just stare at my wrists
A small faint vein
Like a dying stream
So thin and weak
Weak like me
A small cut, and it could be done
You told me yourself
A straight cut
And this meaningless existence
Would be gone

~*~
You won't follow me
You're just like the rest
When I'm gone, you'll forget me
A memory that never was
~*~


There's scars that no one's seen
Fat white worms
Crawling on my skin
Things I'm not proud of
Even in this I've failed
I'm nothing but a failure
Why can't you see?
When I've done this deed
- As it must be done! -
I'll be removing a scourge
A scourge from this earth
I'll be removing myself
Purifying the earth

~*~
You won't follow me
You aren't brave enough
To step into oblivion
And seek eternal rest
~*~

I'm a frail girl
With a black heart,
Black mind
I've no ambition
I can't survive this bind
I think of how easy it would be
To hang myself
From that tree
Dangling
Like the last leaves of autumn
No longer able to find purchase
On dried, withered twigs
Dangling
Waiting for air I know won't come
And as I black out
I know you'll be the last thing
On my mind

~*~
You won't follow me
You're too strong
You won't step off the precipice
For a lover gone
~*~

I stand on the edge of the Shastaan cliff
I look down
I see myself falling...
..
Falling
...
Falling down
And the crimson fluid
That would stain the path
All that would be left of me
would be able to tell
It was me that fell
of course,
'Xept you

~*~
You won't follow me
I made you promise
When I'm gone
So will be my legacy
~*~

I'm not gone though
And I doubt I will
I'm too craven,
Too cowardly
To step off that end
And I love you too much
To become death's grim friend
But when you're gone
Then I'll go
I'll wither silently
Slowly
Like dying mists after a storm
That fade when the sun brightens

~*~
You did follow me
I never knew
I hoped you wouldn't
Now we suffer this death together
~*~

~ Lady Infernal Chirra, Blackened Iron Wolf

Penned by my hand on the 19th of Lleian, in the year 112 MA.