Deepest

It is the furthest from realization, the most treasured of all secrets
that reverberates through your heart
It's also the reason why you're finished before you even start.
You're in deep now-
So deep you can't breathe
It's strangling you.
It's swallowing you whole.
Sometimes it even makes you seethe.
Your hair is falling out, signifying it's taking it's toll.
The world swings around you in mindless parallel with the inner workings
of your soul,
And all you can do is be what you are...a drone, a joyless story teller
Unfaithful to yourself-
So willing to put your love on the highest shelf.
Everyone around you sees your smile
But not the cries of your inner frown.
You're quick to replace a confidence boost with a put down.
All she wants is the truth
For you, it is far too diluted, like tea mixed with coffee
The terrible taste of your mistakes stain your teeth
It notifies everyone you meet.
It's so common to you now, it's like 'rinse, lather, and repeat.'
A cycle of lies you simply can't escape.
You cower under the cover of falsifications,
You find amusement in pain,
And contentment in the unexplained.
You never did a damn thing unless she complained.
Everyone guessed at your moods like it was weather vane.
You're in the deepest,
A con artist that is an expert deafiest.
A liar that expects the truth,
Like a kid wishing for payment for a lost tooth.
Open your eyes wide,
Look not only at your sourrondings;
but what you feel inside.
You feel this way for reason..
No person was sculpted out of ice,
Everyone can have a second chance,
There is no such thing as finality,
There is no such thing as contentment in maliciousness,
The only destination for such a being is in a box.
In a box, is where the deepest of the deep shall go,
And that is the place where love is forgotten, and your memory will be
earsed,
Because without love, your true self becomes diluted, and honesty
becomes but a show.



Penned by my hand on the 22nd of Lleian, in the year 258 MA.