Greetings. This posting is overdue, my apologies.

A few years ago the Iron Ivy Teahouse hosted its first Poetry Reading Night and it quickly turned from an evening of reading poetry to a contest. The Judges were assembled from across the world and used stringent criteria to judge. The winner was chosen and sizable prizes distributed. Their poem is as follow:

Poet: Teani
Entry: A Celesmas limerick story

There's a dwarf around we all know
who comes with presents in tow
Marinated in booze
he sometimes misses his cues
so it's tricky to know when he'll show

A busty lady in Esterport
gathered luxurious import
With hopes to flatter
she assembled a platter
in order to catch her a consort

Soon, with a belch, he appeared
a dwarf with a fanciful beard
His steps in a stagger
he tried hard to swagger
and towards the platter he steered

The buxom beauty began
to jiggle her breasts at the man
to lure in the drinker
hook, line and sinker
all, of course, according to plan

He did not even look at the dame
Instead looked at the food he would claim
but with no amount of grace
he fell flat on his face
as the spirits had ruined his aim

As he lay there and cursed all the food
the loss of which had ruined his mood
The lady stood aghast
from from his foul-mouthed blast
for the woman was too much of a prude

This had definitely not gone as planned
And that language she could not withstand
her face turned red as a beet
when he got back to his feet
with a large broken sausage in hand

"I saved one!" the little man cheered
Then the lady just looked at him weird
when, with a look of pure bliss
he gave the sausage a kiss
and then, with a laugh, disappeared


Penned by my hand on Kinsday, the 5th of Lleian, in the year 473 MA.